"Flight" The Movie - A Word To The Wise

I have conflicting emotions after seeing the movie Flight.  I enjoy movies about aviation, even though the consultants hired to make sure things are right and correct are either idiots, readily ignored or both.  Along the same vein, I have two brothers-in-law who are attorneys and neither one can stand to watch a single episode of Law and Order without stomping out of the room in disgust. I, on the other hand, enjoy the aviation aspect of  movies enough to overlook what seems so obviously wrong long enough to be entertained.

On a light note, I sincerely wish my MD80 had those sexy winglets.  As you are probably aware, there are a few inconsistencies with reality in this and just about any other movie about aviation...MD80s do not have winglets.  I've often said winglets are for wimps,  but that's only because I don't have them.

Seriously though, I am concerned by what I suspect will be an increasing trend of passengers asking pilots if they've been drinking on the job.  Lets be very clear...this is no joking matter.  Accusing a pilot of being under the influence, joking or not, is no different than joking about a bomb at airport security.

I don't necessarily think this applies to people interested enough in aviation to be reading my blog, but I strongly suspect most people have no idea what pilots do day in and day out.  I start my job the night before a trip by getting a good night's rest, because a tired, fatigued or sleep deprived pilot is no better than one who has been drinking.  After arriving at the airport, I spend about an hour researching weather along the route, reading any Notice to Airmen pertaining to the facilities I plan to use, researching the maintenance history of the aircraft and checking the accuracy and legality of the flight plan prepared for my flight by company dispatch.  By the time you see me walking onto the jet bridge, I'm already well prepared.

I am often asked if I actually do anything anymore.  (Picture my frown and furrowed brow.)  You know, with all the computers and everything, pilots just sit there and watch...right?

Have you heard?  New jet aircraft will be crewed by one pilot and a dog. 

The pilot is there to feed the dog...and the dog is there to bite the pilot if he touches anything.  

Even on the most automated aircraft, pilots still play a roll that cannot be replaced.  Many of us still hand fly everything but cruise flight because we enjoy it...and no one allows the jet to land itself unless the weather dictates otherwise.  Even with the autopilot engaged, we are there to intervene when things don't work properly and we're there to make decisions that no computer, no matter how good, can make without the sights, smells, sensations and experience of a professional pilot.  

If you're a regular follower of my ramblings, then you know I have a good sense of humor and that I've always found a healthy dose of self deprecating humor to be good for the soul.  But I can only take so much and I see no humor in being accused of flying while under the influence of anything.

People innocently poke their head into the cockpit as they board and ask some of the most ridiculous things I've ever heard.  Here are the three most common questions.  First, do you really know what all those buttons do?  This is an honest and harmless question and the answer is yes.  I know what all the switches do.  I also know how they interact with each other, how they are powered in case there's an electrical power interruption during flight and I know what happens and what to do if they don't work as designed.

The second question I hear the most is...did you get enough sleep last night?  This is also an honest and harmless question, but I usually lie and tell people that I'm perfectly fresh and rested.  The truth may be that I spent eight hours behind the door of a crappy hotel on a noisy street with some crazy couple having sex all night in the room next door.  The truth may be that I've already been on duty for 12 hours, worked four or five flights dodging thunderstorms all day, and that the FAA says I'm legal for up to 16 hours at the controls...but I don't think people want the truth and I'd probably get fired for giving it to them.

"You can't handle the truth!"

The third most common question I hear from passengers is playfully related to my sobriety.  The answer of course is that I haven't had a drink in at least 8 hours.  "Eight hours bottle to throttle."  That's the law.  For me personally, the answer is that I haven't had a drink in at least 12, but that's just my personal rule.  Many airlines and individual pilots agree with me on this and have policies that are at least as restrictive as mine.

I've already stated this, but it's important enough to say again.  Accusing a pilot of being under the influence, joking or not, is an action that will be taken seriously.  It is a criminal offence for a pilot to arrive at the airport with the intention of working a flight while under the influence of alcohol or any other drug.  He can and will be arrested even if he never sets foot on the actual airplane.  Flight  puts all this in the public eye.  The movie depicts an airline pilot acting in a criminal manner, and while the movie is intended as entertainment, it will no doubt generate negative attitudes and comments from passengers.

These comments, made in poor taste and judgement, will receive varied responses from flight crews.  It all depends on the crew member and their perceived seriousness of the accusation.  One pilot may elect to ignore the comment altogether.  Honestly, I've done this many times.  "See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil."  Only once in my career have I ever interpreted such a comment as a true accusation.  In this case, the flight was delayed over an hour as I insisted on a drug and alcohol test before I would continue with my duties.  For the record, I hadn't had a drink in days.

The legal limit for pilots in the U.S. is .04% blood alcohol, half the .08% allowed in most states to manipulate the controls of an automobile.  I set my personal rule at 12 hours because there have been reports of pilots consuming high alcohol content drinks well outside the 8 hour window and still testing above the limit at duty time.  I want and you deserve the extra cushion.

So go ahead and enjoy the movie.  I know I did.  But understand that it's just a movie and don't even consider accusing a pilot of being under the influence of alcohol unless you have good reason for suspicion.